i-TFTD #23: A Book List

As promised, here is a list of books that made an impact on me. It was a tough task as there are many books I have found useful, fascinating or enjoyable. This is just a top-of-the-mind, partial, unordered list of books of different categories that left a lasting impression, and, in some cases, changed me as a person. For those interested, brief notes on the books are given at the end.

-The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck
-Illusions by Richard Bach
-The Mystic Path to Cosmic Power by Vernon Howard
-Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No by Herbert Fensterheim and Jean Baer
-The Psychology of Winning by Denis Waitley
-Bertrand Russell's Best selected by Robert E. Egner
-Working Smart by Michael LeBouef
-Serious Creativity by Edward de Bono
-The Man Who Knew Infinity: A Life of the Genius Ramanujan by Robert Kanigel
-Debugging the Development Process by Steve Maguire
-Essential COM by Don Box
-Electronic Life by Michael Crichton
-Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Cziksentmihalyi
-The Universe Within: A New Science Explores the Human Mind by Morton Hunt
-The Rational Manager by Charles H. Kepner and Benjamin B. Tregoe
-The Prayer of the Frog by Anthony D'Mello
-The Laughter Prescription by Laurence J Peter and Bill Dana
-Manwatching by Desmond Morris
-Murphy's Law Complete by Arthur Bloch
-The Elements of Style by William Strunk and E.B. White

There are some authors whose writing style is so engaging that most of their books or essays are highly readable. For me, such authors include: Isaac Asimov, Bertrand Russell, Richard Bach, J Krishnamurthi, Ayn Rand, Michael Crichton, Dave Barry, Bill Cosby, Arun Shourie, Vivekananda, Kahlil Gibran and Anant Pai (Amar Chitra Katha!).

Some recently discovered (by me) are: Simon Singh, Marcus Buckingham, Marshall Goldsmith, Chinmayananda (!).

Brief about each book (based on memory)

The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck
Psychiatrist who has written about effective coping of life situations. His themes like discipline and delayed gratification are now widely accepted due to the popularity of Emotional Intelligence. This book will not appeal to those who do not like to read psychology.

Illusions by Richard Bach
Most people love his first book, "Jonathan Livingston Seagull", but Illusions appealed to me more. It has killer statements like, "Members of a family are rarely born under the same roof" and "Argue for your limitations, and, sure enough, they are yours."

The Mystic Path to Cosmic Power by Vernon Howard
One of the first secular spiritual books I read that synthesizes ideas from all religions in a practical, personal manner. Light style but deep content. It was also not trying to hard-sell anything, not even the "best approach".

Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No by Herbert Fensterheim and Jean Baer
A best-selling assertiveness book for a long time, with exercises suggested to overcome that vague hesitation.

The Psychology of Winning by Denis Waitley
Practical and sober advice from a psychologist and motivational writer on being a true winner regardless of the sphere of activity and one's position. Not heavy psychology stuff. Ranks equal for me with "Psychocybernetics" by Max Maltz.

Bertrand Russell's Best selected by Robert E. Egner
A distillation from the writings of a prolific author-philosopher. The most humbling experience of my life to see so many aspects of society, relationships, science, religion, politics and happiness analyzed in a razor-sharp manner and comprehensively treated in a satirical language. I was almost depressed thinking everything has been covered for good! Every time I dip into it and read a para I get inspired. Anyone who feels their clarity of thought and arguing skill is high should read Russell.

Working Smart by Michael LeBouef
Extremely useful snippets on communication, time management, getting organized, collaborating and stress management.

Serious Creativity by Edward de Bono
Most of de Bono's books are creative variations of his first book, "Lateral Thinking", a term he coined to avoid the value judgement attached to the phrase "creative thinking". This one is a good compendium of techniques to use different types of thinking in different situations and how to develop the habit.

The Man Who Knew Infinity: A Life of the Genius Ramanujan by Robert Kanigel
Better than any book written earlier by Indians and Britishers, this one by an American captured the ethos of Srinivasa Ramanujan's times and his unbelievable life story. The flavour of mathematics and his relationship with G.H. Hardy are covered well to cater to all levels of readers. The tragedy and the beauty of the story are balanced as is the greatness and human weaknesses of the main figures. Inspiring to know such men existed (I mean both Ramanujan and Hardy).

Debugging the Development Process by Steve Maguire
Highly recommended book for software leads and managers with unconventional common sense tips along with insider stories from Microsoft.

Essential COM by Don Box
More than any of the OO books by famous authors like Grady Booch, James Rumbaugh and Ivar Jacobson, this book explained the component approach that truly made reuse and encapsulation a reality in the software industry. This was the definitive technical book of the early 90s and though it is Microsoft platform-centric, I believe all software professionals need to understand the evolution from procedural to object-orientation to components to interfaces and now services. Not for non-techies.

Electronic Life by Michael Crichton
Crichton is a medical doctor who wrote this small pocket book about computers (!) around 1987. His interesting style was evident then itself though fame came in the 90s after he wrote Jurassic Park and many blockbusters after that. The book is of no interest now but it was one of many gems I picked up cheap (maybe Rs. 11 or 19 or something like that) at King's Circle in Mumbai where piles of assorted books are sold on the street. Reinforced my interest in computers.

Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Cziksentmihalyi
In 1990 when I carried this book in the New York subway travelling from Queens to Wall Street, one colleague asked me what it is about. Before I answered, another chipped in, "After you read it you will know how to pronounce the author's name!" In fact, you won't. It is pronounced "Me-high Chick-sent-me-high" but the book talks about his research on the flow experience when we are fully immersed in an activity without feeling the passage of time, hunger or boredom. Brilliant research and fascinating insights. His work is being quoted widely in recent years and has relevance for happiness, stress management, motivation, creativity and goal-setting. Slightly dry style.

The Universe Within: A New Science Explores the Human Mind by Morton Hunt
One of the early books that explained the brain structure and functioning based on all the research up to that time. Many such books are now available as the past decade has seen the coming together of electrochemical research, psychology and sociology.

The Rational Manager by Charles H. Kepner and Benjamin B. Tregoe
Another very old gem (published in the 1960s) I picked up from the street at King's Circle. "Deviation Analysis" is a systematic problem-solving method explained with industry examples in the book. As part of the quality management focus starting in the late 80s, this has become quite famous as KT or Kepner-Tregoe method for debugging any tricky problem.

The Prayer of the Frog by Anthony D'Mello
One of many similar books by the author, containing small jokes and anecdotes intended to provoke laughter, thought and insights. Spirituality is not available in an easier package.

The Laughter Prescription by Laurence J Peter and Bill Dana
Peter is famous for stating the Peter Principle and other humorous management thoughts. This book talks about the importance of a sense of humour for good health in, well, a humourous manner.

Manwatching by Desmond Morris
The man who made anthropology famous with many interesting books and controversial theories. This is a large format book with many pictures and mind-blogging facts about humans and other animals. An antidote to the typical belief that humans are special and different from other lower animals.

Murphy's Law Complete by Arthur Bloch
A compilation of many witty observations about people, things, day-to-day problems and organizations presented in the form of laws and corollaries to Murphy's law ("If anything can go wrong, it will"). My favourites include, "If you wash your car it will rain" followed by, "If you wash your car intending it to rain, it won't" followed by "If Murphy's law can go wrong, it will!"

The Elements of Style by William Strunk and E.B. White
An old classic (first written in 1918) -- a short reference manual for any kind of writing. Other than rules of grammar, it contains advice on concise, vigorous writing. The strongly opinionated American professor from a century ago still influences English. If you google on the title you will see hundreds of thousands of results. Taught me to re-read (and rewrite) any important matter. Always becomes shorter. And better.

i-TFTD #22

1. Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival.
-W. Edwards Deming

2. These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves.
-Gilbert Highet

3. It seems in every interaction there is something to learn if we can only see ourselves as students. If we can humble ourselves, and allow ourselves to see the world without our own beliefs and dogmas, then we could see so much beauty awaiting us in each moment.

-Sukh Chugh

_____
These are on one of my favourite themes: learning.

Too many people, in my view, say things like, "What can you learn just by reading a book?" and "You cannot become an expert on this by reading books about it." Worse, they use such statements to not read. One can also say, "What can you learn just by repeatedly doing something?" and "You cannot become an expert on this by trying to do it."

Different things are learnt in different ways, one is not a substitute for the other.

Books are an easy, portable, imagination-inducing, inspiring source of digested knowledge and experience. One book, one page of a book can change your life. Mine has, many times. Will share a list of books that impacted me next time.

Read whatever appeals to you but do read. Nowadays all kinds of subjects are packaged in small, easy-to-read story formats. Those of us based in India have access to the world's best books at inexpensive prices.

i-TFTD #21

#21-1. The word "crisis" is from the Greek, meaning "a moment to decide". The recurrent moments of crisis and decision when understood, are growth junctures, points of initiation which mark a release from one state of being and a growth into the next.

-Jill Purce

#21-2. Life is part positive and part negative. Suppose you went to hear a symphony orchestra and all they played were the little, happy, high notes? Would you leave soon? Let me hear the rumble of the bass, the crash of the cymbals, and the minor keys.

-Jim Rohn

#21-3. No one can go back and make a brand new start. Anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
-Anon

_____
Highly effective people have a tendency to look for crisis situations, problems or issues as opportunities for learning and growth. Many of us unwittingly avoid such situations thereby missing opportunities. Of course, we should avoid creating new problems, anticipate potential issues and mitigate risks, but here we are talking of problems already in existence or those that inevitably crop up despite our best effort.

All of us know life is a mixture of highs and lows but some of us tend to accentuate the negative, dwell on unhappiness. A balanced perspective is needed to move forward.

The third quote reminds us how practical it is to move forward. Looking at the past is useful only on two occasions: to learn something out of it, and to enjoy a few nostalgic moments. Otherwise it is best to focus on what can be done now to influence the future in a positive way.

i-TFTD #20: Motivation + Talent = Strength

Motivation + Talent = Strength
From Assessment.com Newsletter

Hydrogen and oxygen are distinctly different elements, but sometimes they combine to form water. Something similar is true for motivation and talent.

Motivation is what we LIKE to do naturally.  Talent is what we DO well naturally. They can exist independently, but when they combine, they create something special. They create motivated talents.

People often are naturally good at something (talented), but it just doesn't turn them on. For example, Heather is good with numbers, but she doesn't go out of her way to find tasks calling for that talent. Most people have such talents. But then there are those talents that we really enjoy using. These are the motivated talents, and this is where the magic is.

We use motivated talents every chance we get. Most of the time we don't even think about it. For example, Larry has a motivated talent for conversation, and he naturally engages both friends and strangers in dialog. He doesn't consciously determine to do so; it just happens. It's natural and unforced. He enjoys it, and he's good at it. That's the hallmark of a motivated talent.

Motivated talents tend to be irrepressible. They find expression. In fact, if you've ever tried to stifle a motivated talent (either yours or someone else's) it probably felt like you were trying to hold two dozen ping pong balls under water at the same time. Motivated talents pop out, even if no one else is asking for them.

_____
This is a continuation of the theme outlined in i-TFTD #10: Abolish SWOT Analysis. My observation is that many of us are not even aware of our motivated talents, our strengths. If the above two examples do not find resonance in you, here are some more. Some people tend to challenge assumptions, question the problem statement, while other like to think of implementation issues of a given mandate. Some like to research, gather facts and feel comfortable with evidence before jumping into action while others are good at quickly starting work on a positive belief. Some like work that requires extended concentration while others are good at rallying around the team, talking to different people and working as a team.

Whatever our talents are, the trick is to be aware of them and tune our style accordingly in any given situation. In my view, it is idealistic to expect our work to always be in sync with our perceived talents. I say perceived because many of our talents are not yet discovered.

i-TFTD #19: Avoiding Futile Competition

Seeing everyone as your competitor has two negative consequences. First, it isolates you and your efforts, putting a full burden on your shoulders that others could help you bear; and second, it means you waste energy trying to set others back rather than using that energy to push yourself forward.

Consider the following true story by Frank Koch in an issue of Proceedings, the magazine of the United States Naval Institute. Two battleships assigned to the training squadron had been at sea on maneuvers in heavy weather for several days. Koch was serving on the lead battleship and was standing watch on the bridge as night fell. He recounts his experience.

The visibility was extremely poor with patchy fog, so the captain remained on the bridge, keeping an eye on our navigation activities.

Shortly after dark, the lookout on the wing of the bridge reported, "Light, bearing on the starboard bow!"
The captain called out, "Is it steady or moving astern?"
The lookout replied, "Steady, captain," which meant that we were on a collision course with that source of light.
The captain then called to the signalman, "Signal that ship: We are on a collision course... advise you change course 20 degrees."

Back came the signal from the other ship. "Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees!"
The captain barked, "Send, I'm a captain... change course 20 degrees immediately."
"I'm a seaman second class," came the reply. "You had better change course 20 degrees!" By this time, the captain was furious. He spat out, "Send, I'm a battleship. Change course 20 degrees."

Back came the signal from the flashing light, "I'm a lighthouse."
The captain changed course.
The moral of the story is that it is futile to try to set others back when you could turn yourself 20 degrees and go forward!

Source: Psychology of Motivation by Dr. Denis Waitley
_____
My two-bit: Another aphorism is, "pick your battles". There are contests worth fighting even if the odds of losing are high, and there are contests worth avoiding even if the odds of winning are high.

i-TFTD #18: Learning from the Dictionary

Some unusual words courtesy http://wordsmith.org/awad/; interesting to know there's a word for such a thing; all are avoidable behaviour.

sequacious (si-KWAY-shuhs) adjective: Unthinkingly following others

misology (mi-SOL-uh-jee) noun: Hatred of logic or reason

verbigeration (vuhr-bij-uh-RAY-shun) noun: Obsessive repetition of meaningless words and phrases

_____
*We* don't do such things, right? Others do.

Under normal, favourable conditions most of us are logical, independent thinkers who speak well.

It is when faced with adversity, a threatening situation, a crisis, when things are not as we expected, that we sometimes feel compelled to be sequacious.

When our boss (or subordinate or spouse) has a valid counterpoint and is more logical, we tend to temporarily become misologists (yes, it is a word).

On getting caught doing something we ought not, or, when an important person in an audience asks a tough question on the weakest area of a presentation we made, we instantly acquire the skill of verbigeration.

i-TFTD #17

Some of my favourites:

1. I don't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.
-John Cage

2. Don't be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.
-Anon

3. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over and over again, but expecting a different result.

-Albert Einstein

_____
All of them exhort us to be willing to consider new thoughts, ideas, inputs and approaches.

Sometimes we behave -- especially those of us in higher positions --  as though discussing an alternative idea is by itself harmful. We cite our experience with past attempts and our wiser judgement to preempt a suggestion. Even if, at the end of considering a few more ideas, we decide to go with the idea that we originally thought, the exploration would still prove useful. If nothing else, it adds to our conviction and gives the satisfaction of making a well-considered decision.

Better results, by definition, can only come from a better approach to action. To be able to process newer ideas, we need periodic refreshing of the mental database with new data.

Nobody would admit to being afraid to learn. But it manifests itself in different ways like, "I am too old to change", "I already know all this", and "Reading a book never helped anyone achieve anything". Other tactics we subconsciously deploy are to find fault with the persons providing learning opportunity, to question their ulterior motive, to criticize the style in which the input is given and so on.